Five Quote Friday

"He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away."
~Raymond Hull

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
~Dr. Seuss

"You were born an original. Don't die a copy."
~John Mason

"Why try to be someone you're not? Life is hard enough without adding impersonation to the skills required."
~Robert Brault

"It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for something you are not."
~Andre Gide

Croaked

Mr. Frog Balloon was no longer floating through our house by morning. Thank goodness. I'm no longer freaked out. I like him much better this way.

It's Freaking Me Out

Meet Mr. Frog Balloon. I got this for Baby Jaws a few days before Valentine's Day. Big Brother got Mr. Monkey. They're still floating around two weeks later and have been played with quite a bit. Today, Baby Jaws ripped the ribbon off of Mr. Frog Balloon and he has been making his way through our house ever since. I don't like it one bit. It reminds me of a ghost in a Scooby-Doo cartoon. Here are a few photos I took while it just waltzed through the air around me. Freaky Frog!

Gonna get ya!

Whoa, there's a fan!

Seriously, this thing is freaking me out!

But he loves me!

The Circle of Life

Dear Young Naive Mom,

You looked so cute yesterday at Walmart pushing the cart with your sweet little sleeping baby tucked so nicely in his car seat. Weren't you just adorable as you took your time reading the yogurt label before you placed it ever so gently into your cart? You were so sweet as you rolled over near the milk and by my cart filled with my Little Houdini. Your laugh was contagious as my Little Houdini escaped the strap and buckle I had fastened around him so tightly that he had a buckle indentation on his belly. You laughed even louder as I grabbed him and said in exasperation, "Oh my gosh! You little fart!"

I still thought you were adorable as we kept running into each other aisle after aisle with your sweet, quiet, sleeping little baby. I mean, I was a tad bit jealous that you were having such an easy time shopping. Maybe I was becoming a little irritated as I was yelling at my Little Great White Hunter to stop pretending to shoot other customers, wrestling Little (now screaming) Houdini back into the cart for the 28th time and hucking my groceries into the cart as fast as humanly possible just so I could get out of the freakin store!

Oh yeah, I was irritated! I remember the days when I was just like you. The days when I could go grocery shopping with my sweet little sleeping baby tucked so nicely in his car seat. The days when I laughed at moms who couldn't control their screaming, climbing, running children. Those were the days.

So Dear Young Naive Mom, I'm sorry you had to witness me grabbing my Little Great White Hunter by the arm, flinging him around and yelling "Quit screwing around!" after he tried to take a bite out of an apple on display. I saw your glare Young Naive Mom and am sure you've never had to put on such a manic display in public...yet.

You just wait. Your day will come and when it does, I hope I'm there to witness it. I hope I run into you again at Walmart in about 4 years. By then, your sweet little sleeping baby will be a rambunctious preschooler running through the aisles, shooting at other customers, running into carts and eating whatever may be within arm's reach. By then, you should have a toddler too who will stand up in the cart, scream at the top of his lungs and kick you while you push the cart. Oh, your day will come. You will take your seemingly sweet little children shopping and will suddenly realize that you have met your match. And when you do, I guarantee there will be cute little Young Naive Moms there, shopping with ease as they push their sweet little sleeping baby, to laugh and glare at you.

Screen Door

Adventures In a Chimney-ectomy

This blog post cracks me up. It's from a blog written by a friend of a friend, which brings me to my own adventures in a chimney-ectomy. We had our chimney taken out yesterday by some Amish guys, who are just awesome at what they do. Today they are finishing our new front porch.

This is what a sledge hammer looks like coming through my roof.
This is what our yard looked like approximately 5 minutes after they arrived. Chimney was coming down and chimney was coming down fast! Hubs cracked me up too. He was standing outside talking with the boss and said he saw one Amish guy climb up onto our roof. Then a second Amish guy climbed up onto our roof. About a minute later, chimney bricks were falling from the sky. They wasted no time! Notice our 2 1/2 week old snowman is still standing. Leaning with a hole in his head, but standing.
Though it would have made for a funnier post if they would have chased a snake, played football, slept in a hammock or brought along two microwaves for lunch, I'm thankful they didn't. These guys were awesome! We're very glad the chimney is gone! Our porch looks awesome!

Craptastic

Do you know what the definition of "craptastic" is? According to definition-of.com, craptastic is "something so fantastically crappy that it's amusing."

So yes, I literally had a craptastic evening last night...at church.

It was such a normal night, so I thought. We ate our yummy dinner of roast, veggies and biscuits. We weren't running late for once. Both the boys were being good. We got to church on time. We dropped Baby Jaws off in the nursery and Big Brother went to his class. We sat down in the pew, sang a few songs and the bible study began. It was such a normal night, so I thought.

Church was almost over. So close, yet so far away. One of our friends, who had been helping with the kids, came into the sanctuary and sat beside me. I thought he was helping in the nursery and as I heard "Had an accident and he wanted me to come get you," I thought to myself How did Baby Jaws ask for me? I was intrigued. So I followed him thinking, I know I put diapers and wipes in his backpack. What kind of an accident could this be? Baby Jaws asked for me? He says like 5 words.

Then I saw him and smelled him. Big Brother was standing in the fellowship hall bow-legged with a look of fear and disgust on his face. I realized our friend hadn't been talking about Baby Jaws. Big Brother was the one who had the accident.

I thought ok, I can do this. He's pooped his pants. It can't be that bad. I've done this many, many times. It's been a very long time since he's done something like this, but accidents happen.

I began to walk him to the bathroom praying my "Please Lord, let it be solid" prayer. Hey, I told you, I've done this many, many times before. Needless to say, my prayer was not answered so clean up was a tad bit more difficult. It didn't help that Big Brother was so uptight and freaking out about all the poop all over him.

I got Baby Jaw's backpack from the nursery and went through wipes like I was cleaning up a baby seal after an oil spill. I tried so hard not to get poop everywhere, but apparently I didn't try hard enough. I kept running into the closet in the hallway, grabbing paper towels, trash bags, toilet cleaner, and anything I could possibly find to get rid of that smell!

Then I finally saw Hubs walking to the nursery to pick up Baby Jaws. I said, "You have to go home and get some clothes!" The poor little guy was standing in the bathroom on a paper towel in nothing but his shirt. Poop was everywhere! Underwear? Check. Pants? Check. Socks? Check. Shoes? Check. Everywhere!

Another friend was in the hallway with a bottle of cleaner and I had no idea why. She kept asking me if I needed anything else, but I thought we were good. Come to find out later, she was cleaning up poop on the floor that I didn't even know existed. And today, she is my hero.

After what seemed like forever, Hubs finally came back with clean clothes. Later he told me he had stopped to chat about his bow on the way out to pick up the clean clothes. No wonder it seemed like forever! Big Brother washed his hands, got dressed and ran off like nothing had ever happened. Meanwhile, I'm in the toilet scrubbing poop off of everything, unclogging the toilet (yeah that was fun), bagging up umpteen poopy paper towels, bagging up poopy clothes and spraying anything I could possibly find to get rid of that smell!

Accidents happen, especially with little people. I felt bad that my poor friends were all blessed with the stench my son had created because it was permeating throughout the church. I really don't think there is anything that could possibly get rid of that smell. Craptastic!

This Child Will Not Stop

"Mommy, have you already been 21?"

"Yep."

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

Double Digit Mommy

I really don't know why Big Brother is so obsessed with my age. As if I don't feel old enough already, he constantly talks about it.

Big Brother: "Mommy, are you two numbers?"

Me: "Yes."

Big Brother: "I'm only one number."

Again, thanks Buddy.

Rich Mullins Talks

Rich Mullins has been my favorite singer since college and I miss him. I wish he were still here writing and singing songs. He was so truthful and unconventional. He was one of a kind.

I love what he says, "Sometimes it concerns me there are people that can quote my songs or they can quote the songs of several different people, but they can't quote the scriptures."

Perpetuum Jazzile - Africa

I love this video!

Love

"And the laughter of his children is a joy worth toiling for."

Edgar Guest

Stalker-ish

I am in awe. I was talking to Hubs tonight as he sat at the computer signing onto Facebook. Then I saw it. I saw photos on his page of a stockpile of stuff that someone had posted. I saw the word 'coupon'. I couldn't take my eyes off of it. I was so excited!

I asked, almost yelling, "Who is that?"

Hubs told me it was a friend from high school.

Are you kidding me? I thought I was the only coupon-obsessed person on earth that Hubs knows. But, no. There is another woman. Another woman I would love to go shopping with.

Oh my gosh! If you could see these photos! Then I saw the caption under the first photo that said she had bought over 8,000 items in the past year. Eight thousand! She had everything organized on shelves in her garage. There was shampoo, lotion, candles, toothpaste, deodorant and hundreds of other things she was saving for a giant garage sale. I was amazed.

I told Hubs that he needed to send her a message about how his wife is obsessed with coupons, but clearly not obsessed enough. I told him I want her to be my Facebook friend. I want to meet her. I want her to be my shopping buddy. I want her to teach me how to coupon even better. So he clicked on 'compose a message', entered her name and asked, "What do you want to ask her?"

And then I felt a bit stalker-ish, but maybe one day.

Another Snow Day

I had 30 minutes of peace. The boys were mesmerized by Dinosaur Train.

Then the lawn mower racing began, which involved lots of squealing, then laughing, then yelling, then arguing and finally someone (I can't even remember who) getting pushed off of the lawn mower, then crying. When does Dinosaur Train come on again?

Cinnamon Rolls

When I'm not couponing and chasing boys, I love to cook and bake. I am completely addicted to RecipeZaar. I have tried so many recipes from this site and they are just awesome. Here are the cinnamon rolls from start to finish we tried. I use my bread machine a lot and these were very easy to make. I actually let them rise in the refrigerator overnight. I just popped them in the oven when we got up for a quick breakfast. Very yummy.

I rolled out the dough and brushed with butter.

Added the cinnamon sugar.

Rolled up to cut.

Right before I put them in the fridge to rise.

This is what they looked like after rising all night.

Right out of the oven.

Glazed up and ready to eat!

It's Just Not That Easy

When Big Brother pees, there is usually drops left behind on the toilet. It drives me insane, but that's what I get with males in the house. Yesterday after I cleaned the toilet, Big Brother went in the bathroom to pee.

I said, "Make sure it gets in there. I just cleaned the toilet. Don't pee on it."

As he was peeing he said, "Well, my wiener won't go straight. It's just not that easy."

It just makes me think that peeing standing up is not all that it's cracked up to be.

Five Quote Friday

These are all Erma Bombeck quotes

"Children make your life important."

"Housework, if you do it right, will kill you."

"I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars."

"If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it."

"When humor goes, there goes civilization."

What I've Learned from My Own Life

1. My children never seem to sleep long enough, especially on weekends.
   
2. 90% of the time, my boys are dirty as soon as they step out of the bathtub. I don't understand. I swear I just washed it all off, but it somehow magically reappears.
3. As long as I am moving, I'm in the clear. As soon as I sit down to do anything, including pee, at least one of the 3 people in my house will need something, need to tell me something, need to tell on someone or just plain bug the crap out of me.
4. Fine dining for me is a pizza buffet.
5. I don't have to work outside the home, but am on call 24/7 and never get a day off.
6. I could seriously use some liposuction.
7. There are Goldfish crackers smashed into my rug. There is a mutilated magazine that Big Brother used practicing his scissor skills. There is a greasy hand print on my wall. There are so many toys lying around, I have to walk like I'm in a mine field or I might not make it. And that's just at this very moment. It will get worse.
   
8. My sexy husband would probably die if he tried to carry me up a flight of stairs and the only thing he has placed on our bed that smells is an odoriferous fart and he loves me enough to give me that on a nightly basis.
   

What I've Learned from Soaps

1. You never have to take care of your children. They are always sleeping.
2. If you do by chance have to see your children, they are very well behaved and very clean.
3. You never have to pee or poop.
   
4. You never have to cook. Fine dining everyday!
   
5. You never have to work, yet have loads of money to go shopping with.
6. There is always a doctor who can perform any surgery on the face of the earth. Sometimes even a kidney transplant and liposuction back to back.
   
7. Your house is always perfect.
   
8. Your husband (if you're married) is always sexy and can carry you up a flight of stairs to the bedroom where he's placed sweet smelling rose petals all over the bed.

Fast Food

If Baby Jaws has leftover food and if he isn't confined to his booster seat, this is what usually happens. He loads it up in a truck, car, tractor, or trailer and drives it around until he wants another bite. Little Tonka Truck here hauled leftover granola bar around all morning.

Bath Time

We're walking on the dishwasher. Isn't this fun Grumpy Bear?

Oh, you want look inside?

Hope you enjoy your bath!

Save With Scissors

I finally found time to make my first post on my new coupon blog, Save With Scissors. Little by little, I will be building up my page with information about coupons, stores and deals. I'm going to try my best while juggling my two little interruptions sweet boys. Stop by and visit anytime.